Many couples run into incidents of infidelity in their relationships. This is a common issue that could potentially rip the two people apart and typically it’s difficult to discuss what happened when you still want to move forward together. But something that is even more difficult and important to discuss is the possibility of an STD after the cheating occurred.
Since some STD’s can go undetected for a while, it’s important for, both, you and your partner, to get tested. But how exactly do you bring this topic up to the other party? Keep reading to learn how to talk to your partner about getting tested for STD’s after cheating.
Why It’s Necessary to Get Tested for STD’s After Cheating
It’s true that people make mistakes in relationships that they wish they could take back. But the reality is that certain mistakes could actually be a danger to your health, family, and life- and may even be irreversible. This is a harsh truth that people have to face if their partner has cheated on them.
Being sexually active with multiple partners automatically puts you at risk to contract an STD (or sexually transmitted disease). So even if your partner has been intimate with someone else, then you are still just as exposed to STD’s as they are.
The problem with some STD’s is that they are not easy to detect and may show little to no symptoms for a long time. On the other hand, there are some, such as gonorrhea, that will have effects on your body almost right away. It’s important to get tested for STD’s if you know you’re at risk whether you have symptoms or not.
A primary step in making sure that you put your physical, mental and emotional health first is talking about the incident. You will be able to express your concerns about STD’s to your partner during the conversation. Keep reading to find out some tips on how you can bring ease to this topic for you and your partner.
Schedule a Time
If you try to abruptly bring up the topic to the other person, they may become defensive, avoidant or even angry with you. It would be better to let them to that this is on your mind so you can carve out a good amount of time to talk about it freely.
This gives both of you a chance to plan out anything that you want to say that might be difficult to express. It also gives you time to process your feelings so that you won’t enter the conversation with a lot of animosity or bitterness.
Remain Calm
Yelling, screaming or throwing the incident in your partner’s face is not the right way to go about this. You may still need to work on your feelings about what occurred but when you’re discussing the importance of getting tested for STD’s, try to remain calm so that they can be receptive to your message.
Try to remember the whole point when going into the conversation. You can even write out your ideas to be able to come back into focus if you begin to get sidetracked by your emotions. Also practice some calming techniques that may help you throughout the talk.
Speak About Facts
Although the importance of getting tested for STD’s has become common knowledge in society, there are still people who forget how serious it is when it doesn’t directly affect them. This way of thinking can go on for years, then it becomes a habit for them to never think about the risks they take during sex.
The best way to support the conversation of why getting tested after infidelity is essential is to highlight the facts. Do some research and educate your partner about the types of situations they could be facing by not taking this health factor into consideration.
Stick to pure facts and statistics and beware of mixing information with your opinion when talking to your partner. It would also be beneficial to supply them with printouts and pamphlets that you find.
Ask Questions Together
After you’ve done your research and had a talk, you both may still have some important questions getting tested for STD’s and how the entire process works. These aren’t questions that you should ignore, as this could cause you to hesitate in scheduling a test.
There is plenty of information about all the details on what occurs during STD testing and receiving the results. Don’t be afraid to reach out to your local clinic or a center that specializes in testing for STD’s to get your questions and concerns answered immediately.
Find a Sex-Ed Counselor
Working through certain challenging situations in a relationship can be too overwhelming for the parties involved sometimes. If you and your partner find yourselves needing extra assistance to get over this hump, try finding a counselor or therapist with expertise in sex education that you trust to help.
The counselor should be knowledgeable enough about STD’s and other issues that may occur after cheating. Counseling can also help you to unpack some feelings that might be negatively affecting your emotional health as well.
If you feel unsafe in your relationship or think your partner will get upset about seeking a therapist, reach out to a helpline right away.
Don’t Hesitate on Getting Tested
Getting tested for STD’s might be the last thing you want to think about or deal with after your partner has cheated on you. However, you should be making your health a priority and this is an essential part of doing so.
Many people go through this same situation so try not to feel embarrassed or guilty about wanting to keep your health in check. And remember that taking this step is for the best.
The sooner you talk with your partner, the quicker the healing can begin to take place. Visit our site to learn more about how you and your partner can bring back peace of mind in your relationship by scheduling testing.